Human Psychology

1. Forgetfulness:

If we do not have forgetfulness, we cannot feel the taste of a sweet good again and again. We can listen to any music only once. Then we will not have to do anything in this nature after a few days of our birth. This is why we should have forgetfulness. But, forgetfulness has other side effects. Forgetfulness looks like a boon to forget sadness, but it actually also limits human beings from being more mature and sophisticated. We cannot remember a study of books or an art easily. We learn some lessons of behavior or wisdom or society at certain occasions and forget them from the next day itself and the learning will be ignored in practice. If we remember things well, all our remembered knowledge helps well in proper decision making. Many of the decisions that we mistake in can be done without mistakes. If we observe carefully how we are losing because of forgetfulness, we will be surprised to know the fact that we actually lose a lot because of our forgetfulness. Constant study of the matters we are involved with is needed to overcome the negative effects of forgetfulness.

2. Shy nature:

Shy nature is a big problem for many good things. People feel shy or hesitant when they get to do something or tell something before friends or family members that they are known to be not of that kind. This is because we feel difficulty in the consequent exclamatory feelings of others at us in many cases (Others’ feelings reflect in our mind and so we feel in our mind what others feel about us). Some people feel shy to do even good things. Many matters are not shared with family members or friends. Many fears may remain in mind. A lot of things are lost in life because of Shy nature. These behaviors do not come up at friendly family members and welcoming friends. So, shy nature should not be made a reason for problems. Welcoming, friendly and listening nature lets others overcome shy behavior.

Some occasions in life need shy. That is why we have it.

3. Loving friends and animals:

When a person observes his environment, he looks at animals and people and observes what they do. He interprets their souls in his soul. So, he feels the souls of animals or people observed by him or considered by him. But, the observing person wants to feel happy. So, he works for the happiness of observed animals and people; which is in fact an effort to make him-self happy through interpretation of their souls in his soul.

One being loved feels support and eventual stress reduction.

But, interpretation of others’ feelings is not as effective as understanding of self feelings. This property of not being able to understand others’ feelings on par with those of self is called selfishness. This is because of the limited ability of the brain to analyze others’ feelings from the observation, which varies among animals and person to person. Inability to interpret others’ feelings leads to behaviors like selfishness, cruelty, carelessness, irresponsibility, etc.

Let us consider a boy torturing a big ant and enjoying it. He finds more joy in a suffering insect’s dance than he feels its sadness.

4. People often try to interpret what they like and what they do as correct for satisfying their self desires. Actually, what they do may be wrong sometimes. Sometimes, some people do not think at all about rightness and concentrate only in getting the things they want; and if justification is required at a later time, they simply interpret what they did as not in-correct or try for ways to escape.

Illustration 1:

Flower Seller:

A man who was trying to settle in life opted flower selling as his career. He thinks that flowers are generally bought by rich people, who become richer than common people by doing some fraud. So, he can sell flowers at high margins and earn money; and it is not wrong to exploit money from rich people, which does not belong to them.

Illustration 2:

            Fox and Grapes Story:

Once upon a time, there lived a fox in a forest. One day, it was very hungry and searching for food. At a certain place in the forest, it found a grape tree with lot of grapes at the top of the tree. Grapes looked to be ripened, but they were at height. Fox tried to catch those grapes by jumping high. It tried for a long time in different ways. But it was not able to get them. Finally fox thought, “These grapes are sour in taste. They are not so tasty as to try for them” in mind and left the place.

Analysis: To avoid the sadness that the fox did not get the taste of grapes, fox interpreted that they were not having much taste and more over they were pain-full by sourness. Fox suppressed thinking the aspect of grapes that they are tasty and built up justifications on the sourness of grapes with a mix of assumptions and facts. It suppressed the analysis of groundless assumption that these grapes are sour. Actually, fox did not have any proof of bad taste for those grapes. Grapes are generally good to taste. They can be sour and not very good some times. But, fox thought in mind incorrectly to avoid sadness of not getting grapes. But, this strategy does not work in the long run. Some day the fox has to accept the good taste of grapes and then feel sadness of the current loss of taste; or it may end up taking more wrong decisions to avoid accepting the fact.

Illustration 3:

A Merchant’s Auction:

Once, a rich merchant was coming back to his home town through sea after a trade in other countries. It started to rain as his boat was approaching shore. Just as he was about to reach the shore from a 5 km distance, it started to storm and it seemed difficult to reach shore safely unless a miracle happens. He prayed to god, “if you take me to the sea shore safely, I will sell my house and spend all the money got for the poor people”. Somehow, he reached the shore safely and felt that he should not have promised to the God like that in hurry. He reached home and called all rich people for the auction of his House.

The condition is, “His big house will be sold for exactly One buck. No more money is needed to buy it. But, the buyer must buy the domestic cat of the owner at a cost of One million bucks”. 

One of the rich people in that town bought the house for 1 buck after paying One million for the cat.

As per the deal, the merchant gave that 1 buck got buy selling his house to a poor beggar. He kept the One million bucks with himself.

           

Analysis:

            Is the merchant correct?

No. Being selfish and less reasoning efficient, the merchant took this logic as correct.

What exactly the promise to God means is, “I will spend as much money for the poor people as my house worth”. 

             

The ability to interpret things correctly by commonsense gets overcome by the unavoidable forces of selfishness, envy, anger or want for something.

Emotions or passions avoid deep all directional analysis by mind, so that the desired thing should not be missed by the correct analysis. A person shall overcome this force of the emotional elements with the strength of mind. An observing and strong analytical mind becomes less affected by these forces. Such mind will use even a little chance left to it by the Brain for deriving the right solution. Strong thinking gives stability in judgment under all circumstances.

The same merchant would judge the same incident correctly with his commonsense, if the problem was not his, but others. This is an unstable judgment.

Even if our thinking is not affected by desires or emotions, we cannot successfully judge things always on spot, in need. Everyone has to make it a habit to think about law and educate their children and others. This helps us to take right decisions in time, when needed. There is the science of law established in many books and ancient scripts to help people understand law easily, not much respective of the analytical ability or observation ability of individuals.

By respecting wise people and good books, we can follow good principles of them. If we are not able to judge on our own, we can just do as per the established rules in books or as wise people do.

5. Sometimes, Mind does not think much before proceeding to actions during any kind of strong emotions. Though the person in strong emotions may or may not be guilty, the consequences of actions done in strong emotions can be undesirable sometimes.

Make note of one good solution to avoid bad consequences of strong emotions. Postpone any significant thing you want to do in any kind (positive or negative) of strong emotion by a few minutes. You will not do many inappropriate things after a few minutes as your mind gets time to think. Remember this.

Forgetfulness often leads to take wrong decisions. So, it is good to think sufficiently in strong emotions and before any significant action.

6. Jealousy:

Comparing self with a rich (rich in health, beauty, skills, money, etc.) may lead to sorrow and hatred towards the rich.

Knowing others as superior to self naturally or self as inferior to others naturally can cause sorrow. There is nothing wrong in this kind of sorrow if it is limited. This is not jealousy. This sorrow may lead to efforts to make self a better person. Recognize that if you are poorer than someone naturally, there is nothing wrong on anyone’s side. People rich by birth or nature are eligible to enjoy what they have. You can only hope that yourself get better in the future and put effort for that if possible.

When the relative weakness (in skill/property/possession or by disease/disability) of the self is known to keep self at a significantly lower status or luxuries or comforts than others or when self natural inferiority is misunderstood as a self conducted mistake (When you are not the reason behind your inferiority, you are not inferior to others as a thinking object. Natural inferiorities should not be misunderstood as mistakes. For e.g. not being as intelligent as a big scientist is not your mistake. Not being as skillful as a good painter is not your mistake or his mistake. It occurred naturally or by birth. Also, do not think of naturally inferior people as mistaking people.), it may lead to hatred towards the superiors (rich). This hatred is inappropriate. Those who hate under self inferiority (this is jealousy) look for the loss of superiority/riches of superior people, so that when superiors become equal or inferior they can get rid of the consequences of being inferior to others or they can interpret themselves (wrong interpretation) as not worse in personality (skill) to those who were rich earlier. Jealous people may interpret superior people as bad people, so that they can show excuses (show to self understanding and others) to their desire of fall of superior people. Instead, it should be known that inferior people should put more effort to be equally rich or they are naturally inferior.

Inferiority in any way may lead to greed with a lot of miss interpretations.

The riches and luxuries of a foolish and wicked person can be hated. They will be used to disrespect and harm others.

7. Observation:

We do not observe many things around us though we think that we observe most of the things pertaining to us. Many people have soap foam on face after face wash or bath because of not having observation of things related to them. It is difficult to know that we are not observing many things around and related to us, because we do not know the things that we did not observe. People with good observation nature observe their environment better than others do.

8. Facts, beliefs and suspicions:

The sun rises in the sky. We do not doubt our brain and eyes in accepting this, since living becomes very difficult if we doubt them. We accept the observations which are reliable for life, irrespective of the facts. We trust our sense organs and brain. When an observation is reliable, it is not mandatory to know the facts of that observation. An observation is reliable unless there is an alternative observation. ‘Sun travels from east to west of the earth in the sky’ was a reliable observation until it was observed that ‘the earth spins’. It cannot be disproved that your brain is under the control of a data injecting system, where your environment is only an imaginary creation of that system. It is impossible to know the facts of an observation. There are always unsolvable puzzles if we go in deep to find the facts of an observation. All reliable observations are reliable beliefs, because we do not know the facts of the observations. But, all reliable beliefs are not reliable observations. Some reliable beliefs are derived from reliable observations, but themselves are not observations. Many presented models of the universe are reliable beliefs based on reliable observations. The beliefs on the basis of reliable observations, which do not have alternative reliable observations, have to be relied on. Because I have been observing that the sun has been rising in the sky every day, I reliably believe that the sun rises in the sky tomorrow also. There are facts too among what we know. It is a fact that in any right-angled triangle, the area of the square whose side is the hypotenuse is equal to the sum of the areas of the squares whose sides are the two legs. Only some of the facts and reliable beliefs are useful. The observation that today I walked 5 steps more than the person living 10,000 kilo meters away from me is useless. An office sales information is not applicable always and everywhere. Scientific knowledge is the set of facts and reliable beliefs, which are useful irrespective of time and place. If we consider medical research, every finding may not be useful and a medicine may go extinct because of another more useful medicine down the line. But we holistically consider the medical research findings as useful always and everywhere. Even usefulness is relativistic. Some knowledge is very useful, some is very less useful. A reliable belief can have some un-certainty of reliance and belief. (This matter on science needs careful study for proper understanding).

We have to doubt some things. We should not accept and/or believe which does not have enough bases, or which can be disproved using facts or reliable beliefs.

Suspicion is not wrong until it does not endanger science. We must think twice before suspecting someone or something that used to be credible. Man has tendency to suspect relevant people when some bad incident or loss happens to him, even if those people were found good till then. Enough care must be taken in decision making based on observations.

Also, it should not generally be perceived negatively always if someone doubts you regarding something in spite of your honesty, since the suspecting person may not be enough aware of your honesty.

9. A man knows most of his self personality. It is difficult to understand the personalities of others and so we generally do not know others’ personalities well. As we have limitations in thinking and remembrance, we tend to interpret others as like ourselves (less aware good people tend to consider many people they meet as good. Frauds doubt most of the people they meet as frauds). We find out the differences only in certain occasions and we generally forget those findings also. In fact, there exist even huge differences between personalities or intellect levels. If we recognize this, we will take care while coming to an understanding over a person or animal. We will be cautious about frauds and fools. We will receive intellectuals well. We will treat pet animals duly.

For example, pet dogs are unclean by nature (at least not well adjustable by man) and show less thoughtful animal behavior many times which is problematic. They are good only towards the master. They show unwanted rivalry towards all animals and people from outside as they do not like others to share their self comfort (as dogs think), irrespective of who those outsiders are. So, dogs are not as comfortable and intelligent animals (to master and outsiders) as many dog owners think. So, it is good to own dogs watchfully for the safety and comfort of the self and outsiders. If you want to have a very close friend whom you can hug and love, choose a more comfortable animal like cow or a person.

10. People will forget what you did exactly and when, but they will remember the impression about you. Do not think that your small faults (or good things) will be forgotten with time. People may forget your exact faults, but they remember the impression of your character when they see your face. However, even many impressions are forgotten, but slower than incidents.

11. We generally mistake things of self as worldly. This happens because of the lack of understanding how big the world is and how much we matter to others. We feel that we are being observed by others. We forget that we do not mind the problems of mates and yet keep expecting our things to be minded by others. We take too much care for the dress, hair style, look, language, etc and after all we matter a little to others in many cases. Try to get others’ concentration only when and where and how much needed.

12. We generally tend to slightly or fully disobey some rules as we want freedom. For example; you are asked to wear an identity card in a meeting, but you do not do that. Later, a meeting coordinator forces you to wear the identity card. Now you feel annoyed and uneasy inside to follow the rule. Yet, you must follow the rule after being urged. It does not annoy so much to follow the same rule in time. Now you have to obey the instructor also along with the rule of wearing identity card. Then you may turn more adamant and get troubles.

Being passive to discipline will not be perceived as inferiority by others. It is better to be passive to discipline than to be adamant.

Also, it should be kept in mind that adamant people become more adamant if they are forced. They have to be dealt wisely.

13. Worrying for small incidents is a behavior due to lack of understanding how big the life is and lack of sharp analysis.

For example, a friend of me was worried at losing his pen somewhere.

A different friend is worried about buying fruits regularly as they are a bit costlier than normal food. He spent a sum of money for a dinner that he can buy fruits for four months and he was not too much worried at that time.

14. Character:

Character of a person depends on his intelligence (observation) and acumen. Character of a person is not just about whether he is good or bad at others, it is also about whether he is good or not in managing and taking decisions in his regular life. Many factors like grown up environment, exposure, friends, guidance, economic status, health, etc. affect the character of a person. But, effect of all these factors depends on the intelligence and acumen of a person.

Some people do not have control of their tongue. Some people go by their feelings or what they were taught to do and do not understand logic involved, even if someone explains. The acumen and intelligence decides the behavior of a person.

15. Dreaming, thinking and observation make a person knowledgeable, understand the life well and plan in advance. Leave sufficient time for these things out of regular life.

16. If you are struggling for an idea in your work, the chances of getting a good idea are better when you take a break and then return to work than when you continuously keep thinking for an idea in the work environment. This can be, as a break takes a man out of a single dimensional thinking on the problem or the brain regains thinking ability after some rest from serious thinking.  The logic behind is not known with certainty, but this is what was found in studies.